Introspection. That’s a tough one. Only because it takes a sea of courage and multiple bad decisions to finally face your demons. And before you know it, you’re sitting on your balcony, the noise switches to mute and the questions flow in. Is this really where I want to be in life right now? Did I save enough? Did those Bikram docuseries ruin Yoga for me? Should I have not worn a brown lipstick with that salmon pink tee last Friday? You tell me, Lakshmi.
Now, I can go on listing everything I’ve regretted this past year but we don’t have all day. However, I’d certainly like to revisit a few beauty bloopers I made this past year along with a few other unforgivable errors that I wish I could just Ctrl + Z (baby boomers, that means delete). So, while I’m used to documenting my thoughts in my journal that’s highly personal, I’ve decided to self-reflect, only this time in front of you. Here’s my open letter to myself on everything I could have done differently on the beauty front.
Disclaimer: Children under 18 must read.
Makeup Blunders that could have gone right the last year:
1. The Highlight Of The Year
Lakshmi, lip balm is not the solution to everything. Yes, it does hydrate your lips and lock your baby hair but just stop trying to use it as a face highlighter. Puh-lease! The last time you tried dabbing some on your cheeks and greeted your colleague right after, you got your hair (and hers) stuck on your face. Now, she doesn’t greet you anymore at work. You see why this makeup mistake became a vexing problem?
What I should have done: Dab on a powder-based highlighter like theBalm Mary-Lou Manizer Highlighter, Shadow & Shimmer on my cheekbones, brow bone and just a little on the bridge of my nose right after I lock my base. No lip balm this time. Geez
2. Taher Shah on steroids
Hey Lakshmi, Taher shah just called. He wants 'his' hair back. Jokes aside, just because you like his music doesn’t necessarily mean you try to mimic the man. Oh, and don’t get bangs if you can’t maintain one. You need to use a leave-in conditioner after you wash your hair, blow dry (patiently) and lock it with hairspray. I know you loathe hairsprays, but you need it buddy. If you don’t start following this strict routine before you step out, then you shall walk around like a Pakistani-internet sensation with your fabe-lous eyes. Be my guest.
What I should have done: Apply the Palmer’s Coconut Oil Formula Leave-In Conditioneron semi damp hair. Follow that up with a sleek blow dry and lock all the remaining frizz (specifically the fringe) with a good hairspray like the Schwarzkopf Professional Osis + Session Label Strong Hold Hair Super Dry Fix Spray for fabulous shiny hair.
3. The Mascara Massacre
Don’t murder the weightage of mascara. If you forgot to clean the excess formula off your wand because you were running late to work, wake up early. The last time you tried impressing a boy, he was convinced that you just stepped out of an Avril Lavigne music video and that didn’t turn out well, did it? Exactly. Plus, your mascara was not waterproof (slow clap) which is another makeup blunder. You basically didn’t even give the man a chance to look into your eyes because your lashes were busy looking like pigeon wings laced in black tar. I don’t even know you anymore.
What I should have done: Always make sure the excess in your mascara’s wand is cleaned off before application. You can try the Wet n Wild Max Volume Plus Waterproof Mascara for fewer gunky dilemmas. Also, always use waterproof formulas. We all know how unpredictable tears can be.
4. Single till I die?
Why do you think your local nail artist always starts working on your nails with a base coat? Because she has extra time? No, because it’s IMPORTANT. The base coat prevents your nails from getting yellow. It’s all fun and games till your nail paint starts chipping (trust us, it happens quite often). Save yourself and others the horror of uninviting jaundice nails, okay? Otherwise, no man would want to put a ring on that finger my friend. Staying single forever is not our plan Lakshmi. That’s not our plan.
What I should have done: Protect my nails by applying a heavy-duty base coat like the Nykaa Nail Care - Double Duty 2-in-1 Top & Base Coat before swiping on the lacquer. If I skip this crucial step, I’m just one step closer to compromising on the health of my nails
5. Next time, please use protection
I know you don’t like how sunscreen feels on your face, but you’ve got to start somewhere. More so, now with our understanding of indoor UV exposure. The amalgamation of harsh UV rays that penetrate through glass and the toxic emissions from your office tube lights can cause serious damage to your skin. SPF 50 is apparently a hot industry recommendation for daily use. We’ve had this conversation many times, but this time execute it, please? Thank you.
What I should have done: Use a lightweight sunscreen with an SPF 50 like the Dermalogica Dynamic Skin Recovery SPF 50 right before I start my day. Sunscreen cream is not just a beach essential. Not follow this will lead to faster signs of deep pigmentation.
Coming to the end of this self-realization exercise, it gave me a lot more clarity than what I expected. A disclaimer about the person that I am, call me anything but I’m definitely not a quitter. So, you can imagine my disdain to even come up with this exercise. I’ve realized one thing, that when things go according to plan, your dopamine levels light faster than fire on kerosene and everything seems perfect. As easy as that. However, when it rains, it pours. Lord, 2019 has been tough on me. Moments like these, who do we usually see by our side protecting us when the raindrops turn into meteors? Our core squad, partner, the internet? During some of my most difficult days this past year, I’ve figured turning to just myself was the wisest decision I’ve made. I became my own life coach, cheerleader and self-help guru. No amount of therapy (retail therapy included) is going to save you from the reality of life. However, while I may not be able to rectify every makeup mistake I made, I thought I’d start with beauty. And it turns out I have a lot to work on. The beauty of introspection I tell you. 2020, I honestly can’t wait to see what you have in store for me.